If you’re reading this, chances are that life feels heavy right now. Perhaps it feels like you’re wading through treacle, or that the colour has drained from your world, leaving everything in shades of grey. You might feel exhausted just from the effort of getting through the day. This is the reality of depression for so many people, and I want you to know, right from the start, that you are not alone in this, and you are not broken.
My name is Mike, and as an integrative counsellor I have sat with many individuals who have felt this way. I have seen first-hand the courage it takes to even search for an article like this one. That search is a sign of hope, and hope is the first glimmer of light in the fog.
What is Depression, Really?
We use the word “depressed” quite casually in conversation, but the clinical experience of depression is something much more profound and persistent. It’s not just sadness. It can be a persistent numbness, a complete loss of interest in things you used to love, or a constant, nagging irritability that you can’t seem to shake.
It often comes with a harsh inner critic – a voice in your head that tells you you’re not good enough, that you’re a burden, or that you’ve failed. It can disrupt your sleep, steal your appetite (or make you eat compulsively), and drain every last drop of your energy. It can make you feel utterly isolated, even when you’re surrounded by people who care.
Depression is not a choice or a sign of weakness. It is a complex response to a combination of life events, biological factors, and personal history. It is a very human experience, and like any other health issue, it deserves to be treated with care, compassion, and professional support.
How Can Counselling Help?
Talking to friends and family can be a wonderful support, but sometimes it isn’t enough. They may love you deeply, but they are part of your life and can find it difficult to remain objective. They might rush to offer solutions, telling you to “cheer up” or “snap out of it,” which, as you know, isn’t helpful.
Counselling offers something different: a unique, confidential space that is entirely yours. It’s a dedicated time each week, just for you, to speak openly and honestly without fear of judgment, expectation, or of burdening someone. It’s a place to be truly heard.
In our sessions, we don’t just talk about the symptoms of depression; we get curious about its roots. What is your depression trying to tell you? Where did that harsh inner critic come from? What past experiences or unresolved feelings might be fuelling this exhaustion? By gently exploring these questions together, we can begin to understand your depression not as a random illness, but as a meaningful response to your life’s circumstances. This understanding is the first step towards lasting change.
How Counselling With Me Can Help
As an integrative counsellor, I don’t believe in a ‘one-size-fits-all’ approach. You are a unique individual, and our work together will be tailored specifically to you. I draw on different therapeutic ideas to help you find what works best.
One of the approaches I find particularly helpful is known as Transactional Analysis, but you don’t need to worry about the jargon. In simple terms, it helps us look at the different ‘parts’ that make up our personality.
For example, we all have a part that is like a nurturing or critical Parent, repeating messages we absorbed in childhood. When we’re depressed, that critical parent voice is often working overtime. We also have an emotional Child part, which holds our feelings, our creativity, and our past hurts. Depression can feel like this part of us is sad, scared, or has simply given up. Finally, we have a rational, here-and-now Adult part, which can observe the other two and make conscious choices.
Our work together would involve strengthening your Adult self, so you can soothe your hurting inner Child and challenge that unhelpful inner Parent. We can begin to change that internal dialogue from one of self-criticism to one of self-compassion.
We might also explore the ‘life stories’ we unconsciously write for ourselves. Sometimes, based on early experiences, we create a story that says, “I’m not worthy of happiness,” or “Things will always go wrong for me.” We then live out this story, repeating patterns without realising it. Counselling can help you become aware of your story and empower you to start writing a new, more hopeful chapter.
Ultimately, the foundation of our work is the relationship we build together – one based on trust, respect, and empathy. My role isn’t to give you advice or fix you, because you are not broken. My role is to walk alongside you in the fog, holding a lantern, while you rediscover your own strength and find your own way out.
Does This Sound Like You?
If you’ve been reading this and nodding along, feeling that sense of recognition, then perhaps it’s time to take the next step. I know it can feel daunting, especially when your energy is low. But making that first contact is a powerful act of kindness to yourself.
If you’re ready to see how I can help you navigate your way through depression and find more colour in your world again, please get in touch for a no-obligation initial chat.
I look forward to hearing from you.